I have seen many clients and they have come to see me for a variety of different challenges but one of the most common, especially with female clients is a desperate desire to lose weight. The reasons vary from wanting to be healthy to being slimmer for aesthetic reasons. Whatever the reason, they all seem to battle with this goal.

Although individuals are so different, I’ve noticed that there are still many common factors when it comes to losing weight. I will try for the purposes of this article to summarise the key factors to take heed of. Bear in mind that I am not a medical doctor nor a dietician. However, what I share here is a result of my years of research as well as what has been successful for my clients.

The first thing you would want to avoid putting into your body for health and weight loss purposes is sugar, followed closely by refined carbohydrates. These create an environment for disease to develop as well as putting on the calories. There is enough scientific research to show why this is so – too much for the scope of this article. Avoiding sugar also means things like fruit juice, even the ‘100% pure’ variety, which actually contain lots of sugar. Also avoid artificial sweeteners which have been proven to be poisonous to the system – aspartame, acesulfame k, saccharine etc. It also means avoiding processed foods as these often contain hidden sugars and ingredients that promote metabolic dysfunction, insulin resistance, and obesity,

Another thing to take note of: Do not assume that low fat foods are good for you. We are all aware of the recent explosive findings that have blown out of the water years of advice by mainstream bodies that fat is bad. Professor Tim Noakes and his high profile court case made headlines. Noakes, whose book ‘The Real Meal Revolution’ promotes a low carbohydrate high fat (LCHF) diet, was charged with giving unconventional medical advice via Twitter after he advised a breastfeeding mother to wean her baby onto LCHF. After a much publicized trial, he was acquitted of the accusation that this advice was harmful in any way.

Even theNew York Times had this to say:

‘In recent years, a number of studies have cast doubt on the health benefits of the traditional low-fat diet, suggesting instead that eating more fat — with the exception of trans fats — and less sugar and refined carbohydrates might be better for overall health’. (September 23^rd, 2015)

Even if you do initially lose weight on a low-fat diet, you’re sacrificing your long-term health by promoting insulin resistance and related diseases for the simple reason that low-fat diets tend to be high in sugars instead.

More often than not, you’ll find that the weight comes off much easier when you eat more healthy fats and less non-vegetable carbohydrates (added sugars, processed fructose, and processed grains).

There are many other things to consider when it comes to dietary choices but I will cover these in subsequent articles. I am focusing on key aspects of weight loss here.

Any changes in your diet have to be accompanied by an exercise routine. Any exercise is beneficial – the key thing is to keep moving. We were not meant to be sedentary. Our ancestors were far more mobile than we were. They walked more, did more manual activities and certainly didn’t sit in front of a computer for hours on end. Small wonder that we have diseases today that were unheard of previously.

Exercise may help fight off colds and flu, reduce the risk of certain cancers and chronic diseases, and slow the process of ageing. A growing body of research is showing that regular exercise can boost your body’s immune system, increasing the circulation of natural killer cells that fight off viruses and bacteria. Regular exercise has also been shown to combat the ongoing damage done to cells, tissues and organs that underlies many chronic conditions. Studies have found exercise can lower blood pressure, reduce bad cholesterol, and cut the incidence of Type 2 diabetes. Medical experts say inactivity poses as great a health risk as smoking, contributing to heart disease, diabetes, hypertension, cancer, depression, arthritis and osteoporosis. What, you’re still sitting reading this instead of getting off your butt and moving?

But seriously, it’s insane to ignore this but almost all of us do. Even better news is that (news flash) exercise also burns calories and will result in weight loss. Ideally, we should be doing a combination of aerobic, pilates style exercises (like stretching and bending) and resistance training. If that sounds exhausting it will be a consolation to learn that the good old fashioned walk is still one of the best exercises. The health benefits are enormous. Again, the number one word of advice: Move. 30 minutes at least three times a week is the minimum to maintain your health. If you’re trying to lose weight, you have to aim higher. But work out a routine that’s best for you and try and enjoy it. That will ensure that you stick to it.

One more thing I would like to mention here is related to lifestyle and how and when we eat. Don’t eat close to bedtime. This can sabotage your health and attempts to lose weight. It’s important to have a minimum of three hours after your last food intake before you go to bed. Alternative health expert Dr Joseph Mercola explains in detail in a number of articles why this is harmful to your health and results in weight gain:

‘For a number of years now I have been strongly advising to avoid eating at least three hours before bed, and now two recent studies highlight the benefits of eating early dinner, or skipping the evening meal altogether. In one, this singular meal time change was found to combat weight gain. In another, it was found to have a significant influence on your cancer risk. There are logical reasons for these effects’.

He goes on to say that the first study found that eating a very early dinner, or skipping it entirely, alters the way your body burns fat and carbohydrates, resulting in reduced hunger and improved fat burning. The key timing feature of this early time-restricted feeding (eTRF) regimen is to eat your last meal of the day by mid afternoon, and then fast until the next morning. The study found that eating only during a much smaller window of time than people are typically used to may help with weight loss. Eating between 8 am and 2 pm followed by an 18-hour daily fast kept appetite levels more even throughout the day, in comparison to eating between 8 am and 8 pm, which is what the median American does.

The team followed 11 overweight volunteers for a total of eight days. During the first four days, they ate all of their meals between 8 am and 2 pm. During the following four days, they ate between 8 am and 8 pm. The only thing that changed was the timing of the meals; the total calories remained the same throughout. Data on calorie burning, fat burning and appetite revealed that even though the participants ate the same number of calories each day and burned about the same number of calories, the TRF schedule:

• Lowered hunger
• Increased fat burning for several hours during the evening
• Improved metabolic flexibility, allowing their bodies to more efficiently switch between the burning of carbohydrates and fats

Even if an 18 hour window cannot be achieved, anything more than 12 hours between meals is beneficial, with 14 to 16 hours being preferable.

The final factor which I’d like to mention as they key to tackling weight loss is what’s going on inside or with your emotions. I was interviewed for a community radio station on the link between weight loss and one’s emotions and the response was phenomenal. Most people are either completely unaware of the link or have heard of it but are not sure what to make of it as most of the advice on weight loss don’t discuss this aspect. Besides the obvious connection of using food as an emotional crutch or comfort eating, not sorting out negative emotions can itself hinder your attempts to lose weight.

Jessica Ortner is one of the people who have created huge awareness about the role of our emotions in weight gain and given seminars and published a book on it. She has case studies of people who have tried everything to lose weight. When they stopped all this and just focused on their emotions, even though they continued eating what they like, they still lost weight. And this happened repeatedly, with different people. Jessica uses a technique which was established decades ago to release harmful emotions and I use this as well in my coaching practice.

If you would like an integrated weight loss programme which addresses diet, exercise and your inner emotional health,

Contact me.

One of my niche areas for my life coaching is depression and it’s scary that it has become such a problem in this country, especially amongst young people. I read an article just yesterday that counseling services at South African universities have stepped up their interventions in the wake of an increase in suicides among university students. The South African Depression and Anxiety Support Group released these figures in early October 2018:

• 5% of teen suicide attempts required medical treatment;
• 6% of teens had considered attempting suicide;
• 1 in 4 university students had been diagnosed with depression;
• Over 20% of 18-year-olds had one or more suicide attempts;
• According to the WHO, half of all mental health conditions start by 14 years of age but most cases are undetected and untreated;
• Male youth die by suicide more than female youth;
• 1 in 6 teens are/will be addicted to cannabis.

These are horrific figures. I don’t even know where to start at unpacking them.  More than one fifth of the teenagers of this country have attempted suicide and a quarter of university students have been diagnosed with depression! What is going on?  It is very sad that so many people who are just starting out in life and should be filled with hope for the future, feel like ending it all. The challenges are numerous and complex – family issues, relationships, financial challenges, lack of support, substance abuse.

I have coached youth in their teens and early twenties who were battling depression and they were overwhelmed by a feeling of helplessness and despair. It is certainly not an easy time to be young and starting out in life in South Africa. Our education system is not geared to ready our youth for life, a tertiary education is too expensive for most and those who are fortunate enough to graduate are faced with bleak employment prospects. Added to that, our families and homes are by and large, not the bastion of security and stability they are traditionally regarded to be. Children learn to cope with life’s challenges by the lessons learnt early in life, by examples set by parents. When the latter are struggling themselves, the stage is set for disaster. Often, parents themselves are coping with a myriad of challenges and are unable to provide the foundation their children need.

I have ended up coaching entire families after working with just one of the children. Here is one great success: An 18 year old I coached made great strides but found that her home environment was dragging her down into old patterns of unhealthy dynamics. I met with her mother and found that she was also struggling with depression and anxiety. She was fortunately very open to coaching as well and after many sessions with her and the daughter, they were able to break out of old patterns and cope much better with challenges. The work done in the coaching empowered the mother to such an extent, that she was able to insist on certain rules and boundaries at home which she was helpless to do previously. This forced her husband into an ultimatum of seeking help as well and he came to see me. He then realized how his behavior had been enabling much of the unhealthy dynamics, even with his son. The latter joined the programme and was fortunate because many of his issues had a chance of being addressed early. Eventually that family was empowered sufficiently to address their challenges together effectively. I have mentioned this example because as a coach, it was very rewarding to accompany the family on their journey of change and healing, starting with the teenager and then addressing the other family members in a tenacious bid to get her the ongoing support she needed to bring about sustainable change.

Life throws us many challenges, some of them seemingly insurmountable, but ultimately the solution will not come from outside, but from within. The secret is not to succumb to feelings of helplessness, but to seek help.

Call me for a free session.

The month of October is Breast Cancer Awareness month, which is of particular significance to me as I am a breast cancer survivor. It is actually my diagnosis and path to healing that led me to the field of life coaching and for that I am immensely thankful as it has transformed my life in amazing ways. I discovered first hand that our biggest challenge can be our biggest blessing!

I found Louise Hay’s groundbreaking book ‘You can Heal your Life’ immeasurably helpful. It was actually a total eye-opener. For most of us, as soon as we get ill and especially with a serious or life threatening disease, the first place we go to is a doctor and so we should in many cases. The problem is we see this as the only form of healing and it isn’t. We are not aware (or I certainly wasn’t) of the immense power we have to heal ourselves. This is what Louise taught me in her book, with her detailed explanations and insights into how we can do this, as well as sharing her personal journey.

The core message of Louise’s book is that we cause all disease ourselves, through negative thoughts and emotions. This links directly with Deepak Chopra’s theory of quantum healing, which I mentioned in my article on the laws of attraction and vibration. Chopra proved that we have neurons throughout our body. This means that your brain can communicate with any part of your body instantly and it also proves scientifically the mind-body connection. So your thoughts and emotions (subconscious mind) have a direct effect on every single cell in your body. So if your thoughts and emotions are all negative and dark, all low vibrating doom and gloom messengers, can you imagine the effect on your body? No wonder they cause disease. Also remember that we are all made of energy and light and these flow through our body in pathways. India calls them chakras and you might have heard of chakra balancing. This is needed when our chakras are blocked or put out of sync by negative emotions or vibrations. Acupuncture is also designed to unblock these energy pathways and bring healing and well being.

So the way to heal ourselves is to remove all negative thoughts and emotions, all baggage and hurts from the past and to reprogramme ourselves with the opposite – everything positive and life affirming. Louise Hay literally cured herself of a malignant tumour only through this process. She needed surgery but asked for time from the doctor. After healing work, she went back to the doctor and the tumour had disappeared! Of course there is no guarantee that every person will be able to do this and I am not advocating foregoing medical intervention. I am purely using the example of Louise Hay to illustrate how much power is within us to heal ourselves.

After reading Louise’s book I embarked on a life coaching course and started practising after being certified. I also went on to do the Masters and am now a Master Coach. I am now disease free for 5 years with the grace of the Almighty. So I can personally attest to the process of self healing which every person can do. How?

Contact me for a free session.

Congratulations. If you are reading this it means that you are interested in what I can do for you. It means that you are looking for positive change in your life or have goals you would like to achieve. Or you could just be curious which is also fine. Curiosity is good!

Most people seek out life coaches because they’re seeking something more – happiness, peace, good health, prosperity. Or they are seeking to overcome a particular challenge: depression, anxiety, self esteem issues, weight loss, dealing with grief, relationship challenges. Whatever it is, the important thing to remember is that the answers are within you. I help you to find them. I do not give advice or tell you what to do, but help you find your own answers. And the process of discovery, of self actualization is phenomenal. I have found this time and time again in my clients. Many of them come in feeling despondent or hopeless and leave saying ‘I wish I’d done this earlier’ or ‘Why didn’t someone tell me this 20, 30 years ago??’ Believe me, I said the same things. When we realize how we can change our lives for the better once we have the knowledge and the tools, it is truly a groundbreaking and very empowering experience.

Yes, there are some people who need assistance more than others. There are times when life’s challenges and circumstances seem overwhelming, when depression takes hold, when the hill seems too long and hard to climb, when the effort seems too much work. And it happens to every one of us – there is no shame in this. That is when you will need a helping hand a little more, a guide that will lead you to the magnificence that is within you.

So if the abilities are within all of us, why is it sometimes so difficult to find it, why do we so often lose sight of it? Well, to use a cliché, that’s life. We are subjected to all manner of influences and outer forces all the time. Everyone operates according to their own consciousness, and as I discussed in earlier articles, we are all connected through energy and subjected to energy and consciousness of others. The trick is to raise your own consciousness, to find your own truth and to hold firmly to it. And most of us need help doing this because we are so much a part of all that is life, the good and bad. Sometimes the ‘bad’ is more dominant and more overpowering.

To find our own truth might require a journey into the spirit part of ourselves. Most people acknowledge that besides the mind and body, there is a spiritual aspect to ourselves, the part that connects to a higher power. So when I coach, it’s looking at the whole individual – mind, body and spirit, for no true success can be found in ignoring any one of these, as this is the totality of who we are. However, it depends on what your needs are. If you need assistance in one particular area, then that is what I will focus on.

I often get asked ‘What is a ‘Transformational’ Coach. Well, when a client comes to me to achieve a particular goal or address a specific issue, it’s not a matter of simply zoning in on only that. We experience a particular issue or challenge because of something else that is going on. A person is so complex that everything is connected and deep change usually comes from looking at the whole person and addressing deeper issues, like the removal of negative emotions and beliefs. In so doing, the person is transformed and the foundation is set for success in all areas.

Would you like to experience that transformation?

Contact me for a free session

This is the third article in the ‘How Can you create the Life you Want’ series. I’ve already told you about ‘The Map is not the Territory’ and the power of the subconscious mind. Now we look at further exciting components which I’m sure you’ve heard of:  The Law of Attraction and the Law of Vibration. These are universal laws but many people are unaware of them, leave alone how they work. Now to understand the power of these two laws in relation to how we can create our life, let’s look at some science.

I LOVE THIS PART. It provides scientific proof of the power of our thoughts and emotions.

I’m sure you all know that our cells are made up of atoms. At the centre of the atom are only waves of light (Quanta) – which is energy vibrating at a certain frequency. This means that every single cell of your body is made out of these vibrating waves of light, which is actually energy. So, YOU ARE MADE OF ENERGY AND LIGHT. Actually, so is everything in the universe and they all vibrate at different frequencies.  This is the Law of Vibration.

Our neurology or nervous system is wondrous.  We have so many neurons that we struggle to conceive of the number. It was thought for a long time that we only had neurons in our brain. However, in 1989, Deepak Chopra’s book, ‘Quantum Healing’ introduced a revolutionary view. He theorized that all our cells are bathed in neurons. This means that your brain can communicate with any part of your body instantly. Your thoughts are being communicated to all of your cells, all of the time! THIS PROVES SCIENTIFICALLY THE MIND-BODY CONNECTION. This means that your thoughts have a direct effect on every cell in your body. Chopra’s work was also seminal in showing how we can heal ourselves through consciousness. But that amazing field deserves a separate discussion.

So we have neurons all over our body which are vibrating at different frequencies. Now we’ve already spoken about the subconscious mind and how powerful it is. Remember that your subconscious mind is connected to all 100 trillion cells in your body. Now, what is the Law of Attraction? It states  simply that like attracts like. Therefore, the state of your mind will influence and dictate the frequencies that your whole body will emit and therefore attract the frequencies that resonate with it. Sad or negative images or thoughts will move into a low vibration and therefore attract negative things into your life, and the same principle works for positive images. They will attract good things into your life.

So this is another powerful explanation of how you create your experiences outside of you. Your beliefs and emotions give you the life you are experiencing.

How does one actually do this? How does one programme one’s subconscious to raise your vibration and attract the good to you.

Contact me for a free session and let’s talk

In my last article I showed you how we all form our own maps of reality (The map is not the territory) and this is based on what is already within us (our values, attitudes, beliefs, memories).This is all stored in our subconscious mind.  Here I would like to show you the immense power of the subconscious mind and how we can use it to create our reality and the life we choose to have.

The iceberg analogy was created by Sigmund Freud to describe the workings of the conscious and unconscious (subconscious) mind and has been used often to illustrate this. It is very effective so here it is again:

Imagine that the top part of the iceberg, the part above the water, represents your conscious mind and the rest is your subconscious mind. It also represents how we are limited in seeing the bigger picture. Have you ever seen an iceberg and considered its size under the water? We are conditioned to settle for what we can see. We are too eager to accept everything the way it is. We don’t consider the bigger picture.

Your subconscious mind is about 90% of your mind, whereas the conscious mind is only about 10%. Every bit of information that is taken in by the conscious mind is processed and after being filtered is stored in the subconscious. So if we allow ourselves to think negative thoughts, this is what will be stored in our subconscious and this is what influences our behaviour and determines our results in life. If we focus on the negative, this will be our reality. This is what brings down our vibration and leads to depression, anxiety, grief and all manner of negative states. You have the power to lift your depression for example  by focusing on and thinking positive thoughts. Easier said than done. That is what a life coach is for. I will show you how not just once, but forever. You will learn the tools to do this.

Your subconscious mind stores all your memories, habits, emotions, beliefs, values, instincts, programming and behaviours . Think about how powerful it is! There are 19 prime directives of the subconscious mind, which I teach in my coaching sessions. Yet for most of us, we are only aware of our conscious mind and what it is telling us. The only way to get real change in our lives is to reprogramme the subconscious mind.

The third part of the mind is the superconscious – a term coined by Carl Jung. This is the part that is spiritual, and brings you to connection with the Divine. But that’s another discussion.

So how do we reprogramme the subconscious mind?

Contact me for a free session and I will show you how.

‘Whatever the mind can conceive and believe, it can achieve’

‘As within, so without’

‘You can do whatever you put your mind to’

These profound quotes have been said in some form by many great thinkers. How many times have you heard/read it? Do you believe it? Good for you, because it is totally true, and I’m going to prove it to you.

Have you heard of the expression ‘The Map is not the Territory’? This phrase was coined by Alfred Korzybski in 1933. What it means is that our perception of the world is not the same as the real world out there.

We all have our own interpretation of the world. How does this happen? All of us have our own unique understanding and experience of the world based on our upbringing and what we have been exposed to all our lives. We have formed our own beliefs, perceptions, values and attitudes.  That is our map of the world. That means our friends, family and customers don’t see the world in the same way we do.

So how does this actually work?

Remember we are being bombarded with information  every second of every day. Our minds cannot possibly process all this, so it filters this information into more manageable sizes. What we choose to retain and process depends on what is mentioned above: our values, beliefs, attitudes, etc. These are our filters.  This information is then processed and forms internal representations in our mind using our five senses (seeing, hearing, touch, smell and taste).

These  sensory experiences are then turned into a picture, a sound or a feeling in our minds. These are then passed onto even more powerful filters called Deletion, distortion and generalization. In other words, we process and alter the information our mind has received by distorting it (changing it according to our imagination or creativity), deleting (leaving out information that does not serve us) and generalizing (this allows us to make sense of experience and understand things).

This then ultimately leads us to create our map of what is actually out there. After having gone through such a subjective process, based on what is already within us, how can we expect it to be the same as others or to represent what is actually out there?

But guess what, we are conditioned to believe this. Most of us are.

So as a result we do not understand the role we play in creating our reality. If we understand this, we then are aware of the immense power we have to create the reality we choose to have. THIS IS PROFOUNDLY EXCITING. AND IT NEVER FAILS TO EXCITE ME EVERY TIME I THINK ABOUT IT!!!

This then has further implications. Our maps are what in turn feed into creating our emotions, memories and beliefs and this in turn determines our thoughts and hence our behaviour. And it is our behaviour which determine the results in our life. Another profound illustration of how we create our reality.

Everything that has been described above is ultimately stored in our subconscious mind. And this is a powerhouse that we really need to get acquainted with. This is what I will be talking about in my next article. Ultimately our subconscious mind determines our results.

So why am I telling you all of this? As I said in my introduction, to make you aware of the power you have within yourself to create the life you want. How do you do this?

Contact me for a free first session and I will show you how!